When reading about the systems approach to parenting I found it rather interesting, children are influenced by parents and parents influenced by children. Now what does that really mean? Perhaps taking a step back and looking at it differently and saying that the entire family is influenced by their surroundings such as their neighborhoods, or their religious organizations. This totally makes sense to me. When thinking about how people are and the way that they act does have a lot to do with where they are from, who they were raised by or what religious organizations they belong to. For example I know that a lot of celebrities live in Beverly hills, California. Do you think that you would find a celebrity who makes a lot of money shopping at a thrift shop? I mean there are some celebrities like Ben Maclamore who has a song about such things, but honestly you find them on rodeo drive shopping until they drop. Spending what most of us Americans make in a year in just one day. I came from a middle class family, and yes I like the finer things in life ( who doesn't) but I would never spend 200 dollars on a pair of jeans or a purse to me that's insane. The way I grew up was to save your money for a rainy day and not spend crazy amounts on things you can get cheaper somewhere else. It all depends on where you come from and how you where raised.
Different dimensions of parenting, this one struck me as interesting as well because I am a parent. I agree that children benefit from the degree of warmth that they feel from their parents. I love my daughter to pieces and when she gets hurt or is feeling sad or sick I always cuddle her and give her loves. On the other hand this section further describes that with children you cant be too controlling and you cant be careless either. The problem that I have seen in my experience growing up is if a parent tries to control their child too much a lot of things can happen, this is what I have seen happen.
Scenario one: parents are too controlling with their kids never let them spend the night with friends, they have to come straight home from school and can never go out with their friends. what happens in this situation is the child will start to rebel big time. I see the parents intentions here, and they are completely understandable. They don't want their child to be exposed to whats out there; drugs, sex, media etc... but let me put it this way, this is what I would tell parents like these, you can chain your child to their bed and make them stay in as much as you want but mark my words either way in your child's life they are going to experience these things in life and its better to expose them to whats out there now so you can guide them to make the right decisions now then when they are adults and don't know how to deal. I'm not saying let them do drugs and let them drink and give into the social media or media out there. I am simply saying lighten the grasp you have on them. Believe me when parents show trust to their children most of the time that means a lot to them and so they don't want to break it. If these parents continue to be this way with their child when their child leaves the house most of the time they run into these types of things that their parents have tried to keep them from and they don't know how to handle the situation so most of the time they cave in.
Scenario two: Now lets look on the other side of the spectrum shall we? we have parents who let their child run a muck! They can be out to late hours of the night, their parents let them swear and cuss in the home, pretty much the child is running the parents. This is the advice I would give these parents, I understand that you want a good relationship with your child, but just being their friend isn't going to cut it. Its going to lead to your child making bad decisions which could cost you in the long run. I feel like parents should put healthy boundaries on their children. Discuss with your child what they think is reasonably fair. Including them on decisions like this means a lot to a young adult it makes them feel grown. All in all, my opinion on parenting with dimensions is balance your boundaries. Don't be too controlling but at the same time being careless can lead to destruction.
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